Frequently Asked Questions
Some of your questions about mediation answered.
What services do you provide?
We will work with you to provide whatever help you need to work through your conflict situation. That might be as simple as a chat on the phone, it might be a structured mediation between two people, it might be some work with teams or groups of people.
Is it really confidential?
Yes. If you choose to contact us, we won’t share anything you tell us, unless you specifically ask us to do so. The only exception to this is, naturally, where there is a safeguarding risk such as someone suffering significant harm, or where there are issues of breach of law. When we report on our work, for example when we report how many cases we have closed this quarter, neither individuals or parishes are named.
If I call you does that mean I am committed to a mediation?
No. Mediation is only one of number of ways we can support you and it isn’t necessarily the right approach in every situation. If you choose to contact us, you are absolutely free to withdraw at any time. There is no commitment to continue on your part.
What kind of situations can you help with?
- Managing and reducing relationship tensions, for example within the worshipping community or between clergy or between PCC members.
- Addressing historical tensions that are getting in the way of mission and ministry.
- Working well together on teams and groups.
- Resetting relationships after serious arguments.
- Working out how to approach a challenging issue at a meeting.
- When there is much more heat than light on a particular subject.
- When you feel stuck and unable to move a debate forward.
Can every conflict be fully resolved?
No. each situation is unique and there are, sadly, some deeply bedded issues that simply won’t yield to attempts to resolve them. In these cases, we can support you in working out ways to prevent further damage and to help minimise the impact that the issue has on mission and ministry.
How much time can you give us? Do we have an allocation?
We have supported people with issues that took 30 minutes on the phone and some that have needed hours of work from mediation team members across multiple sessions with individuals and groups. Every situation is unique. If we feel we can’t help we will say so and will explore with you the other avenues you could pursue.
Are you trained to do this work?
Yes. Every member of the team has received formal training in mediation, is committed to continuing skills development and receives regular supervision.
The diocese is small. What if I know my mediator?
We won’t pair you with mediators who know you, unless there is a specific reason to do so (and you are happy to work with them again), for example an ongoing series of mediations. If it isn’t possible to find a mediator you don’t know then we may suggest using an external mediation company.
Do we have to pay to use the service?
Our volunteer mediators have a vocation to this work and give their time and skills for free. There are some costs involved in running the service of course. It helps if parishes are able to provide appropriate meeting space and if they can contribute to travelling costs for the team.