I would stop at nothing to end everything

Published on: 1 September 2017

Ten per cent of children and young people (ages 5-16 years) have a clinically diagnosable mental problem yet 70 per cent of children and adolescents who experience mental health problems have not had appropriate interventions at a sufficiently early age*. Norfolk teenager Hannah Green share her story of how her faith has helped.

In 2015, age 14, my life hit rock bottom and I felt like I had nowhere to go: my dad had walked out of my life for good, I was failing at school and my self-esteem was at its lowest.

How could there really be an all-caring and all-loving God when I felt that the light at the end of my tunnel had gone for good?

From December 2015 through to December 2016 my life was a dark cloud of depression, anxiety, self-harm and suicide attempts and the only thing I hoped for was for it all to be over and this huge amount of darkness to be lifted from my shoulders.

Two weeks before Christmas 2016 I took an overdose of pills. I told myself that I would stop at nothing to end everything. I had gone through two packets of pills and was still going to carry on when God reached out to me. I knew God was there listening to me and being my support when I needed him the most. No matter how many people had walked out of my life, I knew God would be the one person to stay forever.

Growing up within a Christian family meant I was blessed to have a supportive church family around me who would pray either with me or by themselves for me. One of the main focuses that they prayed for was the support and guidance from a mental health team that could help me to get back on to my feet.

After a nine-month wait I was assessed and went on to receive therapy from professionals with the skills and patience to work with young people like myself. With a much clearer head now, I can see how much love and support God was putting in place to help me get the best care possible.

Now, at 16, I continue to have struggles daily, but with my stronger faith, I now know that God made me the way I am for a reason and that I am not alone. I am so thankful to God for all he has done for me and I now have a much brighter light at the end of my tunnel.

* Fundamental Facts About Mental Health 2015 The Mental Health Foundation

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